I am in week 26 of my pregnancy right now.
Saturday I will hit week 27, that is the third trimester!
Every week that I am pregnant I get an email introducing my "new week". And every week the baby's size is compared to some food. How on earth they choose the foods that they do I will never know. Week 26 was a English Hothouse Cucumber. What the heck is the difference in that and a regular cucumber?
They are using the picture more to depict the length not the mass (thank God!). I am thankful for the quarter in the picture because I have no way to know how long that is. It truly makes me laugh every week and is probably the NOT the most endearing thing you could compare a baby to. "Hey you cute little 'English Hothouse Cucumber' you!"
It's fun to joke about the fact that my baby boy is compared to strange food on a weekly basis but in all reality he is not cucumber. He is a real life, breathing, in the flesh, coming in three months whether I am ready or not,
Am I excited? Yes!
More excited than a kid on Christmas! More excited than someone who just won a gazillion dollars! More excited than getting 100 English Hothouse Cucumbers!
Am I scared? Yes.
When I think of the responsibility it is at times overwhelming. And it's not like I am an old pro at this parenting thing. Sure, I have said the classics: "I will never do that to my kids", "My kid will NEVER act like that", "THIS is how WE would handle this situation". Those are all cheap words now. Sure I thought that was realistic then. I can say "THIS is the kind of parent I will be" but what am I basing that off of? I can assure you it is NOT years and years of experience. When it comes down to it I don't know a whole lot.
So here I am. This person who really doesn't know what I am truly getting myself into yet all of that aside it does not alter the fact that Britt and I are 100% responsible for raising this child.
So today I realized how stinking grateful I am that it actually is NOT just Britt and I. Just like it is NOT just Britt and I in our marriage. There is another factor.
SO thankful for the fact that I never walk through any new, scary, challenging situation on my own. SO thankful that my success is not based on my knowledge (although I totally know that seeking wise council from people will help a TON). SO thankful that I can say my dependence on the Lord as a believer, a wife, a MOM is what will determine my success. SO thankful that I am aware of how incapable I am and that I TRULY need the Lord's help. I could never do this without Him. How do people do this without Him?
With that in mind is there still a little fear? Yes. But there is an aspect of adventure, anticipation, not being able to wait to see how God works through this completely incapable vessel to raise a child. Raise a child that loves the Lord and fears Him. Raise a child that has a heart for the lost. Raise a child that calls my God-MY Abba Father, by the same name. Wow! I could NEVER do that alone but I cannot wait for the opportunity to be used by God to help lead my little man in that direction.
So much wisdom needed here!
So thankful for my Lord!